


(Stop It, Stop It) Just Let Me Out

by notimmortal



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Because this wouldn't be my writing without angst, But you can read it however you want, Canon Divergence, Gen, He takes over Jeremy's body completely, Jeremy is trying, Just know that the end implies boyfs, Like, M/M, Michael is the best friend ever, Really it's more of a pre-relationship fic, Some angst, boyfs if you squint, kinda demon!squip, what else
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 18:25:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18155429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notimmortal/pseuds/notimmortal
Summary: Jeremy’s eyes blinked open slowly. The last thing he remembered was screaming from pain and a little voice saying “Your Squip” before everything went dark. Sighing, Jeremy went to stand up, but his legs wouldn’t move. 'What the… Why can’t I move?'Then, out of nowhere and against his own volition, Jeremy started moving. 'What the fuck! What’s going on?' His body carried him into the bathroom at the mall and he saw his hand reach out and lock the door. Looking into the mirror, Jeremy could tell something wasn’t right.His eyes were glowing blue.





	(Stop It, Stop It) Just Let Me Out

**Author's Note:**

> Hello hello!  
> I guess today is the day of me finally posting old works that I finished but never took out of my WIP folder!  
> I wrote this in December so tbh I don't even remember what my original idea was or where it came from, but rereading this fic didn't make me want to scrap everything so now it's posted.  
> Title taken from 'Good For You' from Dear Evan Hansen (because it's my favorite song and because it works really well with this fic)  
> Hope you enjoy!

Jeremy’s eyes blinked open slowly. The last thing he remembered was screaming from pain and a little voice saying “Your Squip” before everything went dark. Sighing, Jeremy went to stand up, but his legs wouldn’t move.  _ What the… Why can’t I move? _

 

Then, out of nowhere and against his own volition, Jeremy started moving.  _ What the fuck! What’s going on? _ His body carried him into the bathroom at the mall and he saw his hand reach out and lock the door. Looking into the mirror, Jeremy could tell something wasn’t right.

 

His eyes were glowing blue.

 

“Hello, Jeremy,” he heard and saw his reflection’s mouth moving, but Jeremy still couldn’t do anything. “Yes, you’ll find that I’m in control now.”

 

_ Who are you? _

 

Jeremy heard himself chuckle darkly. “Why, Jeremy, we went over this already. I’m your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor. Your Squip.”

 

_ Why can’t I move or talk or- _

 

“In order to make you be more chill, I will have to be in control full time. You’ll get nowhere if I let you take the reigns. This seemed like the best alternative. You just sit back in your consciousness, and I’ll handle the rest.”

 

_ I don’t know… _

 

“Don’t you want to be the cool dude? The hero? Whatever you want, Jeremy, this is the way to get it. I am the way to get it,” Jeremy wanted to interject again, but his body was on the move once more. “Just watch, Jeremy. See how easy I can make this.”

 

Jeremy watched, slightly in horror yet slightly in fascination, as the Squip moved to talk to Brooke and Chloe. The Squip called Brooke sexy (something Jeremy sort of agreed with but would never have said out loud) and made friends with the girls through a ‘mutual enemy’.

 

_ I don’t even know Madeline! _ Jeremy protested in his mind. The Squip ignored him, getting into Brooke’s car and leaving the mall.  _ Wait. I was supposed to wait for Michael! We have to go back! _

 

The Squip rolled his eyes.  **_You’re right where you need to be, Jeremy. This is the only way you get what you want. Trust me._ **

 

***

 

Michael looked around everywhere for his best friend once he had gotten his Ecto-cooler, but Jeremy was nowhere to be found. “What the fuck? Where could he have gone? It’s not like he has a car to get out of here…”

 

Michael sighed to himself, making his way back to his car. Throwing the drinks in the passenger’s seat (since Jeremy wasn’t taking the space himself), he went to start the car when he saw something peculiar across from him.

 

It was Jeremy. With Brooke Lohst, one of the most popular girls in the school. 

 

Michael was about to get out of the car and go yell at his friend, because seriously, what gives? But then he noticed something else. Jeremy was standing ramrod straight, not his usual slightly hunched and awkward position. He also seemed to be moving in a fashion that was almost… robotic?

 

“It worked,” Michael breathed out in disbelief. “Holy shit, it actually worked!” Then Michael felt a sinking feeling in his stomach. “It worked… And he left me. He promised…”

 

Michael shook his head, trying to clear the thoughts of Jeremy out. It was probably just a one time thing. Besides Michael had been dragging to get back from Spencer’s anyway, of course Jeremy would take the advice of that pill and try and make some new friends. That’s what it was for, right? Jeremy would be back to his normal self tomorrow at school.

 

***

 

_ Not having control over your own body is weird _ , Jeremy thought to himself as the Squip talked to Rich. Rich could tell that Jeremy had the Squip, but it didn’t seem like he could tell that the Squip was controlling his whole body.  _ And where has Michael been? _

 

**ZAP!**

 

_ Ow! What gives man? _

 

**_Pay attention to how I speak with Rich and other students of his popularity level. The only way to get your body back is to learn and the only way to learn is to pay attention._ **

 

Jeremy sighed, but did as the Squip instructed him. He listened to the type of words the Squip used, watched what kind of hand gestures were put in place, and noted how much cooler everyone seemed to think he was. He was even talking to Christine, and for once without making a complete fool of himself.

 

_ Maybe this really is better _ .

 

**_Now you’re getting it! I could let you give it a try for a little bit if you-_ **

 

_ No!  _ Jeremy could feel the Squip quirk his eyebrow.  _ No. It’s… It’s best if you’re in control. _

 

And, to Jeremy, it was. Everyone seemed to like him much more under the Squip’s control. Jeremy took note over the entire week how many more people tried to talk to him, some people even hitting on him, and he knew that this was for the best. He was making himself better, even if that meant letting go of himself.

 

It was better for everyone this way.

 

***

 

Much to Michael’s dismay, Jeremy did not become his normal self the next day at school. Or the next day. Or the day after that.

 

Jeremy was, for lack of a better word, popular now. He was sitting with Rich and Jake during lunch, talking about sports like it was something he actually cared about. Michael could hear it from his spot, alone, a table behind them. Michael purposely sat directly in Jeremy’s line of sight, looking at his friend in anger, and sometimes in sadness.

 

It was like Jeremy couldn’t even see him.

 

And even if he could, Michael could tell that it wasn’t his Jeremy anymore. The Jeremy that was sitting a table away from him was cool, sometimes even suave, and he seemed drained of his usual Jeremy-ness. There was no stammering, no hunching over, no nerdy jokes, no… No Jeremy.

 

And Michael hated it. 

 

“I’ve gotta get that thing out of him,” Michael mumbled to himself as he walked between his classes. “But how?”

 

The internet didn’t help. Nobody seemed to know anything about the Squip. It was like the thing didn’t exist at all. Sighing, Michael turned to his WoW buddy. Michael tapped out a quick message: ‘You ever heard of this Squip thing?’

 

The reply was almost immediate: ‘Dude, those are bad news, don’t take it.’

 

Michael’s blood turned ice cold. ‘What can you tell me about it.’

 

***

 

It was the night of Jake’s Halloween party and Jeremy felt awful.

 

Every moment, day in and day out, Jeremy was learning more and more things to hate about himself. How he stood, how he talked, what he liked,  _ who _ he liked. Everything about him was terrible, wrong. He was a loser who would die alone if it weren’t for the Squip.

 

But Jeremy missed Michael. He missed his best friend, he missed being in control of his body, he missed being himself.

 

**ZAP!**

 

_ I know, I know. Everything about me is terrible. Everything about me makes me want to die. I  _ _ know _ _. _

 

**_It doesn’t seem like you do, Jeremy, otherwise we wouldn’t be doing this again. Now, shut up so I can make nice with your BETTER friends. I’m doing this for you, Jeremy. Remember that._ **

 

Jeremy just felt empty at this point. Everything he did meant pain now. Shocked for thinking about his old life, his best friend. Shocked for thinking about finding a way to remove the Squip. Shocked for wanting to end his life because that would be better than this.

 

And the guilt for leaving Michael behind.

 

Jeremy remembered clearly the day that the Squip told him about the Optic-Nerve Blocking.

 

**_‘I blocked Michael from your field of vision. He’s a link to Jeremy 1.0, to become Jeremy 2.0 you have to make sacrifices._ **

 

_ But I promised him- _

 

**ZAP!**

 

**_Your promise means nothing now. He hates you anyway, so just let it go. You don’t need him.’_ **

 

But Jeremy did need him. Jeremy needed Michael more than anything else, but it was too late for that.

 

Like the Squip said, Michael hated him.

 

Jeremy zoned back in as the Squip excused himself to go to the bathroom. Once inside, the Squip locked the door and dragged Jeremy over to the mirror. 

 

“Just look at yourself, Jeremy. Still such a wreck after all I’ve done for you.”

 

Suddenly, there was a voice from beside him. “Jeremy?” The Squip turned Jeremy’s head to reveal Michael. “Jeremy, what are you doing? Why are you talking like that.”

 

“It’s none of your business,” the Squip snapped. “So get lost.”

 

“I think it is my business if my best friend is acting like a total jackass!” Michael yelled back. “Seriously, why did you have to take that thing? It’s making you a monster! It’s literally going to ruin your life Jeremy!”

 

_ Michael! I know! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! _

 

“Quiet!” The Squip yelled at Jeremy, sending another shockwave down his back. “This  _ thing _ , as you call it, has been improving my life steadily since I took it.”

 

“It fucks with your brain, man. People go crazy trying to get these things out!”

 

“Well good for me then! I don’t need to get it out!”

 

“Jere, are you even listening to a word I’m saying?! This thing can have catastrophic effects on your brain! It can fuck you up for life!”

 

“I don’t care! You’re just jealous, anyway.”

 

Jeremy watched in horror and Michael’s face fell. “You really think that low of me, Jere? After everything we’ve been through?”

 

The Squip sneered. “Yes, I do. Now get out of my way, loser,” the Squip said, pushing past Michael. Michael looked shocked, hurt,  _ betrayed _ . 

 

And Jeremy fucking lost it.

 

“Stop it!” Jeremy yelled, using his voice for the first time in weeks. He forced his body to turn back to Michael, who looked scared. “Michael, that wasn’t me, I swear, I-”

 

“That’s enough, Jeremy,” the Squip said, taking back over. He gazed at Michael with disdain. “You’re lucky no one would ever believe a word that comes out of this loser’s mouth, or we’d be in big trouble.”

 

***

 

Michael watched in disbelief as Jeremy seemed to argue with himself. That’s when it clicked in his brain. “Holy shit. I didn’t know these things were capable of full-time bodily possession! Jere, you need to listen to me: these things are like demons. That’s why they function like they do, why they promise to help but only end up fucking up your life!”

 

“I know!” Jeremy, or at least Michael assumed it was Jeremy, cried out. “I know and I’m sorry, Michael. I’m sorry and I just… Stop it! Just let me out!”

 

Michael reached into his pocket to reveal a bottle of Mountain Dew Red. “You gotta drink this, Jere. It’ll get rid of the thing. Green to activate, red to shut it off.”

 

“I don’t need that!” the Squip said, knocking the closed bottle out of Jeremy’s hand. “I don’t need  _ you _ !”

 

Michael looked at his friend. “Yes you do, bro. And I need you, too. We’re never not gonna be a team, remember?”

 

“It’s an effed up world, but it’s a two-player game,” Jeremy said softly, moving against the Squip once more. Michael could see the color of Jeremy’s eyes flickering between their normal brown and an electric blue, but by the time he got to Michael, the color was all Jeremy. Michael held out the bottle, and Jeremy drank. “Thank you.”

 

And then Jeremy passed out.

 

***

 

Jeremy woke up in a dark, but familiar room. Sitting up slowly, he looked around, taking stock of bean bag chairs, video games, and “Michael?”

 

Michael, who had been sitting on the floor next to Jeremy, shot straight up. “Jere! You’re awake!”

 

“Michael, what the hell happened? How did I get here?” That’s when it hit Jeremy: He was talking, he was in control. “What happened to the Squip?”

 

“We got rid of it,” Michael said sternly. “I got you to drink some Mountain Dew Red and that thing is dead and gone now.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Jeremy said softly. “Fuck, Micha, I’m so sorry. I should’ve listened to you, I should’ve never taken that stupid pill, I should’ve told Rich- Wait. Rich! What happened to him, is he okay?”

 

Michael nodded. “I was able to get some Red in him, too. Told Jake what happened, and he actually listened to me. He’s taking care of Rich now.”

 

The two were quiet for a few minutes, then Michael spoke up again. “Was it worth it?”

 

“No,” Jeremy said without hesitation. “Not for a damn second. Do you know how weird it is to not have control of yourself? To see the world from your eyes but to have no input? And to see that world get better because you had no say?”

 

“My world didn’t get better with you gone,” Michael said softly. “In fact, it kind of fell apart.”

 

Jeremy was silent for a moment. “I’m really sorry, Micha. And I know you can’t ever forgive me-”

 

“Jere. I can’t forgive you right now, for obvious reasons,” Jeremy winced, but nodded nonetheless. “But that doesn’t mean that I’ll  _ never _ forgive you. You’re my best friend, even after all this.”

 

“How can you even say that?” Jeremy asked, his voice shaky. 

 

“Because you told it to stop. You heard what it said to me, and you made it stop. You fought for control over yourself again, not because of what it did to you, but because of what it did to me.”

 

“You’re still my favorite person,” Jeremy said, taking Michael’s hand. “And I’ll prove that to you, somehow.”

 

“Yeah,” Michael said, squeezing Jeremy’s hand. “I know you will.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and kudos are always appreciated but never required! Come say hi on tumblr (ireallyneedabetterusername)! I'm always open for prompts AND I'm on Spring Break this week so I should have more time to write.


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